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Friday the 13th…My Lucky Day

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It was a mixture of nervousness and excitement, anticipation and relief. I had no vision of children, a career or a business at that time. Somehow I was solely focused on one beautiful redheaded 16 year old girl. Nothing else in the world mattered as a 16 year old boy.

That night was awkward. We talked some, but I think we mostly watched TV. A VHS copy of Disney’s A Little Mermaid.

Another redhead seeking her prince.

I can’t remember a lot more about that night. It started when she picked me up in her ~1980 tan/beige Toyota Celica (I didn’t have my license yet). It ended with a ride home. No kiss…it was the first date. She was a good girl, and I was a gentleman.

Somehow I did well enough to warrant another date a week later (and a first kiss), then a trip to the Junior-Senior prom a few weeks later.

Nearly two years passed before I lost her. Nearly four passed before I found her again. That’s another story for another day.

Something started twenty years ago today…my first date.

My first kiss.

My first love.

My first (and only) wife.

Two wonderful children, countless pets and almost 14 years of marriage.

It all can trace back to an April night 20 years ago. I wish I could remember it better. But it doesn’t matter. I have the last 20 years worth of memories to know that something special happened that night.

And I’ve never worried about a broken mirror, walking under a ladder or a Friday the 13th since.

Thank you Heather for being a part of my life for more than half my life!
I thank God that before I found Him, He put us together!
I love you! — James

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Sneaking Millions Past US Customs

Confession time.

In February I didn’t declare millions of dollars I gained upon returning from Dan Miller’s No More Mondays Cruise. Lock me up and throw away the key…

Actually, the title is true, but it wasn’t illegal. When we returned to the Port of Miami, I had to fill out a customs declaration form based on the value of the items I was bringing back into the US. I put about $180 down to cover the gifts I purchased in Jamaica and aboard the ship.

But I didn’t, I couldn’t and I wouldn’t declare what I really had of value. It was hidden out of site…in my cranial cavity!

The past year has been a period of personal growth and discovery. Instead of staying where I was (stuck), I bit the bullet and started spending money to achieve my dreams of self-employment. It began with a visit to Dan Miller’s (of 48Days.com) Sanctuary in Franklin, TN (sounds cult-ish when I put it that way…it’s not, but never mind) for 48 Days Certification training. Just spending time with Dan, his family and the others in attendance convinced me to do more.

So I joined what is now known as the Free Agent Academy. FAA is run by Dan’s son Kevin Miller and uber coach Chuck Bowen. FAA is all about helping entrepreneurs/solopreneurs and wannabe’s grow their businesses in order to live life and work on their own terms. It is the single best self-employment resource on the planet (I’m biased…more on that at the end).

That led to attending FAA events in June and September, and again in January of this year. Each time I made new friends and further refined my business ideas. But I left the January event empty. Something wasn’t right and I couldn’t figure out what it was.

No More Mondays Cruise 2010
Attendees - No More Mondays Cruise 2010
Then came the cruise. Oh, it wasn’t an ordinary vacation. It was work with fun thrown in. Dan Miller hosted the event, along with a stellar lineup of coaches and speakers including Chuck Bowen (he’s everywhere!), Kent Julian and Justin Lukasavige. The other attendees were brilliant as well.

It was during a presentation by Chuck that I had an epiphany. In an instant, I was able to connect all that I had been learning over the last year, and actually the entirety of my life. In one moment, everything was crystal clear. I am a strategist, gifted by God, and my purpose is to help others achieve their goals and dreams by making their paths clear and productive. A late night discussion with Chuck on the last night of the cruise nailed it down.

I didn’t get a single million dollar idea on the No More Mondays Cruise. I got a bunch of them. I just didn’t tell customs!

FAA ProfessorMy head was spinning during the 12 hour drive home from Miami the next day. Since then, I’ve continued to refine my business approach and started getting new clients and leads. I’ve even become a part of the leadership team at Free Agent Academy as the new Professor for Strategy and Planning (our Roadmap group).

So if I disappear in the weeks following this post, you’ll know the men in black came and deleted me (and this post probably…you better print it for evidence!).

If I don’t disappear, you’ll probably find me on the next No More Mondays Cruise in February 2011. Perhaps I’ll even be invited to present…

Dan? ;-)


Can’t wait for next February to advance on your business?

Join me in Colorado for the next Free Agent Academy event!

May 2010 FAA Event
May 21-23, 2010 -- Hosted by Kevin Miller & Chuck Bowen

Watch the preview from Kevin:

Click Here for Details & Registration Info

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I Hope You Lose Your Job

Yep. Read the headline again. I mean it—if you hate your job.

Job haters suffer lives of quiet desperation (well, not so quiet if you monitor Twitter and Facebook!). They dread Monday and long for the weekend. Is that really what you plan to do for the next 20-40 years? Not me!

God designed us with skills, talents and abilities. But just because you’re good at something doesn’t mean you should spend 2,000+ hours every year doing it. He also gave us an inner spirit that defines our values, dreams and passions.

At the intersection of what you’re good at (strength) and what you enjoy doing (passion) is the opportunity to love your work (job or self-employment). And here’s the best part: people who love what they do make more money!

Who makes more: a waitress with a nice smile and great customer service, or one with a sour face and bad attitude? Fast forward a few years and see which one is selling high end real estate…

Don’t just quit your job. There are bills to pay and you need a transition plan:

1) Know Yourself – This is harder than it sounds. What are your skills, talents and abilities; your values, dreams and passions?

2) Know What You Want and What It Takes to Get There – Define your target and get the knowledge for the job (not always through school!).

3) Bust It! – Do whatever it takes within legal and moral grounds to get the job!

Sadly, most people will never do what it takes to change their lives for the better. Fortunately, some lose those jobs…and it makes all the difference in the world!

Note: This article originally appeared in January 2010 issue of the Tri-City Review.

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Day 3 of 2010=Failure

By now, the dreams and hopes for a new world in the new year have been extinguished for most. That’s a bit somber, and I hope it’s enough to make you want to start a fight with me.

You see, if that puts a fire in your belly, it may be enough for you to make something of this year after all!

It’s almost like we expect that simply changing the calendar will bring about all these wonderful new opportunities. So we sit and wait and expect, only to be disappointed. And now, three days into 2010, the shiny new year has lost its luster for most, and tomorrow–OH NO! The first Monday!–things will seem quite the same as they did at the end of 2009.

Here are seven reason why we fail when setting and achieving goals:

1) Procrastination/Fear of Failure
Procrastination and fear have a lot in common. Call them brothers or sisters or cousins. They have the same root. We put off things we are afraid of. Going to the dentist, hitting the track and sometimes, we’re even afraid of our own success. Life would change if we’re successful…not sure you’d like that, eh? No sense setting a goal for something you’d rather not do anyway…maybe next year.

2) Lack of Hope or Self-Confidence
I bet even Zig Ziglar had a few bad days a few decades ago! We’ve all had bad days. Hope is a powerful thing…perhaps the most powerful of things. It’s the basis of faith, and it’s prowess has been displayed in every arena of life, from politics to medicine to sports and beyond. If you don’t believe in yourself, how can you believe in and achieve your goals?

3) Don’t Know How
I learned a long time ago that ignorance is not the same as stupidity. Stupid is not illegal, but it’s not likely to change. Ignorance…well, there’s a cure for that! See that little injection of hope spring up?

4) Not Written Down
What’s of incalculable value yet worthless at the same time? Intentions. Good or bad, they lead to nothing if no action is taken. Writing something down makes them real. Tangible. Shareable. And if a goal is shared…so much more can happen! See #7!

5) Not Specific and Measurable
Vague goals are barely goals at all. I want to lose weight isn’t a good goal. Is one pound enough? One ounce? To what purpose do you want to lose weight? Health, looks, better fitting clothes? A good goal is specific and measurable enough that anyone who sees it knows what success looks like.

6) No Personal Ownership
You can’t set goals for someone else, and you can’t let someone else set your goals for you. That doesn’t mean you can’t or don’t need help along the way (see #7). It simply means that whatever you want to achieve, you need to own it. Own the success, own the failure. Either way it’s yours. Own nothing and you’ve already failed.

7) No Deadlines or Accountability
Deadlines are a forcing function. Drawing a line in the sand will motivate most, though it will scare some away (and they aren’t the accomplishing type anyway). Going it alone is almost certain to leave you short of accomplishing any goals with signifigance. We all love the “do-it-yourself” stories…except when you dig into the story, you realize most of those DIY-champions had a lot of help along the way.

Tomorrow, the laws of successful goal setting. You don’t want to miss it!

Need some help discovering, documenting or achieving your goals? Join Victor Encinas and myself for our goals seminar starting January 13th. Just go to http://www.GoalVictory.com for details and to register. (BTW, the 10% discount has been extended through Jan 10th!)

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